KpacoTa CnaceT Mup-Beauty Will Save the World

(Quote from Fyodor M. Dostoyevsky's THE IDIOT, 1869)


Monday, September 7, 2009

Day 1 -the wake...

It just isn't fair. Life, that is. It was hard seeing Jenny. But she was beautiful, never-the-less.


Met more of her family. Loved her Mom, and my son really liked her Dad. Her Mom sounded a bit like my Great Aunt Betty, so besides being such a lovely woman, as Jenny was, her voice and intonation endeared me to her even more. I am so very sorry to have met them under such circumstances. I could tell who she was, and Jenny's lovely sister as well, from the beautiful skin and facial features, and hair.

And Steve's wonderfully friendly family of siblings, made us feel like family.

It's supposed to be the other way around. You are not supposed to bury your children. God's master plan is certainly perplexing at times. It can be so very difficult holding on to faith at such times. But, of course, that is exactly what it is that we are to do.

And it was so great seeing old photos and wedding pictures. And I never put two and two together that Jenny and my Dad shared the same birth date. Tomorrow is their 19th wedding anniversary.

We most certainly must be in some alter universe right now. It just doesn't seem real.

In church yesterday Fr. led us in Memory Eternal for Jenny. I am Eastern Orthodox. Something that the Eastern Orthodox have is beautiful services and memorials . The Memory Eternal song is solemn, respectful, and a tear jerker. It reaches into the heart to emote all the feelings caught up inside- all in one little , short song. This was the song sung for Jenny.

I am sorry that this is an art blog, and all I seem to be writing about is all of these unfortunate events. We certainly have had a lot this year. I have had years like this before, but it never makes it any easier.

And for those of you more reserved than I, I am sorry, but "I wear my heart on my sleeve". And as my good friend Jalene says, "And that's a good place for it to be." In fact, that is what I have always wanted to be written on my tombstone, "She wore her heart on her sleeve, and ........... .....................".

So dear reader, forgive my many tears, for it heals my broken heart. At least, I hope it will.

ps- Alex, my oldest, being the doll that she is, has worked so hard for me for 2 days, tagging and finishing off items, helping me to get ready for this weekend's show, Boonsborough Days. If you are nearby, be sure to stop on by and say hello. It will be good to see a friendly face:)

9 comments:

common ground said...

Lovely post Lydia, Yes our hearts should be on display. I feel sorry for those who cannot express their joy or grief.
I would have loved to met you under better circumstances, but I so appreciate who you are and the kind of friend you can be. I've joined you as a follower to keep up with you. Have a good show this weekend. I know it will be hard, but still good.
Blessings, Debra

glorv1 said...

Hi Lydia. I read your post and I'm so sorry. It's always so hard when we lose someone we know or love and care for. I wish you the best. I popped in via I believe it was Mystele's blog. Take care.

stefanie said...

i am truley sorry, i just started going to white wednesdays, and saw that your dear friend passed away. i just wanted you to know that people care.

ceekay said...

I came to your blog through WW. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend and so sad to losing a fellow blogger. Life is so confusing at times isn't it? So glad you have such sweet memories of your friend.

Laurie said...

I'm so sorry, Lydia, for all you're having to go through. I wish I could indeed stop by your show, I know it won't be easy. I'll be there in spirit.

gaffergirls.com said...

out visiting today...
your pain is felt ...
hoping you see some sun today....
mona & the girls

Kirkie said...

It's easy to see why Jenny cherished her friendship with you. I miss her deeply.

Jann said...

So very sorry to hear such sad news on your two posts, Lydia--so sorry.

vivian said...

I like your heart on your sleeve.. Youre a sweet kind hearted and caring person. no sense in hiding that!
so sorry about your friend. I'm glad that you are maintaining your relationship with her kids.
wish I lived near by, I would have loved to come see you at your show.
HUGS!
vivian